Interpersonal relationships are central to human existence and are deeply influenced by attachment styles. Family, romantic relationships, and friendships are characterized by intense, frequent, and diverse interdependence present over a considerable period of time. The initiation, development, maintenance, and dissolution of such relationships are sources of powerful and often conflicting feelings. Relational ambivalence is a core feature of most close relationships, and experiencing mixed emotions towards someone close is a fact of life.Attachment styles, which are formed in early childhood, play a critical role in how individuals navigate these relationships. Secure attachment typically leads to healthier and more stable relationships, while anxious or avoidant attachment can result in relational ambivalence and challenges in maintaining close connections. Recognizing when to resolve the tension and when to hold the contradiction takes a lot of self-exploration, self-awareness, and strong boundaries. After all, healthy relationships start with healthy individuals who understand their attachment styles and work towards secure connections.
Please note that I support individuals in relationships (including romantic ones), but I am currently unable to offer couples therapy.
10 ways therapy with Lisbon Counselling can help clients experiencing difficulties in relationships
This depends on the nature of the relationship (a family member, a romantic partner or a friend) but this can be helpful in most instances:
01
Offering the client a supportive and non-judgemental space for talking about their feelings in the relationship.
02
Experiencing and expressing counsellor’s empathy towards the client. The therapist holds a 'dual attunement' frame for the client, which means attuning to the client both relationally and neurologically.
03
Encouraging exploration of client’s emotions. Brainspotting is an innovative neuro-physiological method, which utilises points in the client's visual field to access unprocessed material in the subcortical brain and to help regulate their nervous system.
04
Supporting the client in discovering their needs and their boundaries in relationships. Developing client's self-attunement.
05
Internalising the counsellor’s unconditional acceptance leads to a higher sense of self-worth of the client. Higher self-esteem allows the client make better choices e.g. to set healthy boundaries.
06
Supporting the client in discovering their genuine 'self', which reduces psychological tension and helps the client to be more fulfilled, personally and in their other roles e.g. parent, partner or a friend.
07
Together with the therapist, the client can explore new ways of coping in difficult situations e.g. self-regulating their nervous system when they are feeling triggered in a relationship.
08
The counsellor can support the client by modelling concepts e.g. boundaries, respect, trust or acceptance of the other person in their own therapeutic relationship.
09
Therapy can offer valuable insight into client's attachment style and its impact on their relationships.
10
The therapist can offer psychoeducation to enhance the client’s understanding of their own feelings, to normalise what they go through and to validate their experience e.g. the concept of boundaries or relational ambivalence.
Please feel free to call/WhatsApp, email me or use the form.
I will aim to respond within 24hrs Monday - Friday. For mental health emergencies please contact your local health centre.
In-person sessions are available by prior arrangement at:
Rua Alexandre Herculano 19, 1250-008 Lisboa
Nearest Metro stations: Avenida and Marquês de Pombal.
